I've lost count of how many times I've heard "I didn't have a choice." It is probably one of the most over-used excuses. Sometimes it looks like all our freedom is taken away and we have to do things that we do not agree with. But of course this is not the truth.
So what is it about your choices? There is an old polish poem about a donkey that got two different things to eat. One was oats and the second was hay. The good donkey had to make a choice but was so afraid that if he picked up one he would lose the other. This dilemma lead him to starvation and finally to death. His problem wasn't that he had to make a choice between to eat and not to eat. His problem was what to eat.
And here we go with our life. When you go to the grocery store you do not think "will I get food?" but it is more about "What kind of cereal should I pick up today; there are 27 different types." It is, of course, just an example, but it shows us where we are as a society. Our choices are in many ways around things that really do not matter. We surround ourselves with them to make our lives more meaningful, at least in our own heads. But when it comes to the real, serious choices then very often we run to: "I didn't have a choice." I have to be very carful not to run into it too.
The truth is that we always have a choice. Some times it is very difficult and complicated, but the choice is still there. And this is one of the most beautiful things that we have. I make the choice of which way to go in my life. You make the choice too. Even love itself is a matter of choice. I decide that I want to love God.
The next time somebody tells you they didn't have a choice, don't give them a hard time, but just show them that they have a choice and that they have to make it instead of hiding behind the excuse. This can help them actually to change their life.